How To Help Your Marriage Survive The Difficult Times

Marital bliss seems to be an unachievable notion these days, with nearly 50 percent of first marriages ending in divorce. Second and third marriage divorce rates are even higher, so with those odds, why even bother? Sometimes, going your separate ways will be the best option for both parties, but what if you aren’t ready to give up? What do you do to make it through a rough patch and continue on as a couple? Take these steps into consideration.

Rely on Each Other

Learn to forgive and move forward. Of course, this is easier said than done but forgiveness is key in any successful relationship. Holding a grudge against your spouse will do nothing but breed resentment and anger so get what’s bothering you off your chest. Share your feelings with your partner-no matter how trivial they may seem- and find a way to resolve a conflict instead of letting it fester inside you.

It is okay to ask for help. Pride and Ego get in the way of so many relationships. Remember that you and your spouse are a team. Your marriage is going to take work; work on it together. You may feel like your feelings don’t matter or that you are alone but you are not. Put your partnership to good use and overcome the rough times as a team.married By hjrosasq

Back to Basics

Start a memory jar. Grab an old jar and every time something momentous happens in the both of your lives, write it down and put it in the jar. It is so easy to forget about the good parts of your marriage when you are fighting or facing financial burden. Remembering a camping trip you took together and reminiscing over old photos will remind you why you are together in the first place.

Slow down. Both of you can be so caught up in the struggles and stress of everyday life, that you forget to appreciate each other. Make a point to take time- even if it is only once a month- in which the two of you can simply enjoy one another. Remind your spouse often that you love and appreciate them.

Find a Solution

Be honest with yourself and with your partner. So many times, we put our feelings on the back-burner instead of acknowledging them. We feel the need to lie in order to save face with our partner or because we are embarrassed of our emotions. If something is bothering you, bring it to light. Be truthful with yourself; acknowledge your needs and wants.

You do not always have to be right. Sometimes one of you is right and the other wrong. Sometimes you are both right and both wrong. It does not matter. Let go of the need to always be in control. When one person always feels the need to assert their dominance over a situation, the other person can feel controlled or resentful of not having their thoughts heard. Practice actually listening to your partner and getting to the root of the issue at hand, instead of focusing purely on who “wins”.

Consider seeking counseling. Many times an unbiased listener can make a marriage stronger. A counselor or therapist can find deep-rooted issues that you and your spouse weren’t even aware of. If you are having trouble communicating with your partner and cannot seem to make it through a rough patch, seek outside help.

Simply remember that your spouse could very well be feeling the same as you. Marriage is a partnership and BOTH partners need to put in the effort to make it work.

Micah John writes about relationships, finance & saving money at

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